Alright, folks, gather round as we dive headfirst into the world of pumpkins. Fall’s here, and just like every year, pumpkins are the equivalent of that one always-a-little-drunk uncle who becomes the life of the party. You know the one. Every family has one. But pumpkins? They’re everywhere. Popping up in your lattes, on your doorsteps, and even in your soups! But here’s the kicker: not all of them are fit for the plate. That’s right; just because it’s pumpkin season doesn’t mean all pumpkins are up for grabs. Let’s break it down, shall we?
- The Good
The delicious bunch. These pumpkins are the superstars of your fall dishes. They’re sweet, they’re soft, and they’re oh-so-perfect for that homemade pie or soup. Think of Sugar Pie pumpkins or Cinderellas. If pumpkins had an A-list, these would be the celebrities, signing autographs and taking selfies with fans (or should I say, eaters?). - The Bad
Now, here’s where it gets tricky (trick-or-treat, got it?). Some pumpkins might look all ripe and ready for eating, but they’re just there for the looks. Like the deceptive friend who promises to pay you back but conveniently ‘forgets.’ You might spot them at the grocery store, large and in charge, but beware! Their flesh is stringy and bland. They’re better off as Jack-o’-lanterns than in your stomach. If you’re carving faces into it and placing it on your porch, it’s probably one of these bad boys. - The Ugly
This category might be a bit harsh, but we’re sticking with the theme, okay? These are the pumpkins that aren’t edible at all. They’ve got warts, bumps, and colors that might make you think they’ve been involved in some dubious activity. But in all their weirdness, they’re magnificent for decoration. Their funky shapes and patterns bring all the spooky vibes for Halloween. But eat them? Nah, you might as well lick a haunted house’s wall.
As you sip on that pumpkin spice latte and wonder if there’s a real pumpkin involved (spoiler: probably not), remember that not all pumpkins are created equal. So this fall, as you navigate the pumpkin pandemonium, be a savvy selector. After all, you wouldn’t want to bite into a pie made of the Halloween decoration now, would you?
Until next time, pumpkin pals. Stay savvy and always question your gourd choices. 🎃🍁🍂
Photo by Anna Tukhfatullina Food Photographer/Stylist.